Sunday, November 30, 2014

Returning to the Source

When I first started out on this Pagan Path, I had explored a number of beliefs and practices. My first self-dedication was to Diana for lack of knowing any other deities at the time (back in CEGEP in 1990). I was soon after initiated into a family tradition akin to British Traditional Witchcraft.

As I grew and learned and explored, I came to a point where I no longer fit the roles and traditions I had been following. Academically and career-wise, everything had fallen through for me and I was lost. This is what happens when you train for 4 years in a field with the intention of teaching in it only to graduate a couple months after the government removes that field from the educational curriculum. I felt lost, floundering.

It was at this point that I encountered The Source, Spirit, Divine. I have come to know this divine being as a Goddess, Sophia, Goddess of Wisdom. I did not know her as this the first time I encountered her. And truly, she could have been male, but my perception was that this divine being was female and lunar. She was the ever changing moon, the constantly evolving source of knowledge and wisdom. She has remained in the background of my worship to this day.

Almost.

I spent time training in a coven, earning my 3rd Degree and Gardnerian lineage. All things change. I eventually walked away from this for the greater good of all involved. From there I started incorporating East Asian practices and beliefs into my usual Celtic training, trying to mesh them into a smooth and syncretic system. It worked on some levels and not on others.

Then life threw me off a metaphorical cliff with no parachute.

I lost my business and a great many other things. That loss damaged everything about me and how I view myself and my perceptions of what I was capable of or not. That was a deep and dark hole to be in for several months. I lost sight of the light. I struggled with my inner demons and the demons lying in wait from earlier traumas in my life. It was a hard climb from that deep dark hole. I could not hold onto a spiritual path as I was living in survival mode. I thought I had no support from anywhere, that no one cared. I was of course wrong. It was just hard to see the small candles of friends and family. The time was needed to heal.

When that healing finally started to take hold, She was there to remind me, "I have been here from the beginning and I am that which is attained at the end of desire." The path was once again there before me, if I was ready to step back onto it. She rose within me and around me. She wrapped me in her arms and reminded me that I was never alone. She poured love and wisdom into my wounds so they may heal. All things in life are a lesson, she had reminded me. As we learn, so do we become wise.

So I returned to The Source. Sophia Rising.

The path I form is Momiji Moon in honor of both Sophia's lunar aspect in my life and the momiji kami (spirit/minor deity/Japanese dryad) that has been instrumental in my steps forward. Through them I have been able to build a beautiful syncretic tradition whereby I blend my Euro-Celtic Gardnerian training with East Asian religions and philosophies. This time, I have found something that makes my soul sing, strengthens me, feeds light into the dark corners, and helps me do and be what I need to.

May She inspire not just me, but others along their paths of Wisdom. 

~ Lady Scarlet

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Introspections of the Dark Moon

Looking forward to the next Dark Moon in November. These rituals are dedicated to the Raven.
Came across this picture on the internet and it really captures the meaning of the Dark Moons.